Sunday 1 April 2012

Day 18 - 4th Chemo Cycle

Today was another great day.  My family members continued our visit with them.  We met for breakfast and the men sat at a booth on their own and the women sat together in another booth just because the restaurant was so busy.  What a wonderful visit we had as we ate, laughed and talked!!

Once we were finished breakfast, my uncle and I switched places in the cars.  He joined my husband so he could hear the commentary of what we passed as we toured the city.  I shared my commentary with my aunt, my cousin and her fiance in their car.  We visited a plaque which included the name of a special uncle, James Russell Martin, that died in World War II at Arnhem.  After visiting the plaque, we continued on our tour of the city and showed our relatives the house that Great-Uncle Russell lived in from 1941 to 1944 as well as other points of interest.

It was a meaningful afternoon where we shared close family ties, beautiful scenery and wonderful memories. All while we created new memories.  As we were in a local arena, my uncle mentioned how proud he was when I was much younger and sang the national anthem on a regular basis at the Kitchener Rangers home games.  For some reason, this touched a chord deep inside of me and I felt very special and loved.

Before we knew it, it was time for our visitors to begin their trek home.  The weekend went by much too quickly.  I had a great time and the memories will again help carry me through the next week or so as I start my 5th round of chemotherapy on Thursday.  I'm not looking forward to it.

I'm very tired tonight but I'll be able to rest up for the next few days before I go back into the Cancer Clinic.  Sometimes this blog easily writes itself and at other times, like tonight, it is a struggle to get my thoughts and feelings written out.  Perhaps it is more difficult when I am tired.  I do notice that I have moments of impatience with myself as well as those around me tonight.  It's probably due to the fact that I am tired.  Perhaps it is also a sign of the latent anxiety that simmers just under the surface as my treatment day advances.  After my treatment on Thursday, I will only have one more chemotherapy treatment to go.  I'm conflicted as I want this all to be over soon but at the same time, I really don't want to have to go through any more injections!  I really do dread the first week when I feel weak, sick and miserable.  Those are the moments when faith and the love of family and friends carry me through.

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